Doing Singleness Well

Monday, we are fasting and praying together for marriage for those who desire it, for godly men to be leaders in relationships and in the church, and for the Lord to soften and turn our hearts toward Him.

There’s a statement I’ve heard on several occasions that I can’t get out of my mind when I think about fast.pray.:

“It’s the areas of your life where you’ve been hurt the most where God can use you the most.”

I don’t think I need to describe to any of you the hurt that accompanies being single. We’ve talked about our struggles with shame, with doubt, with jealousy, with fear. We’ve been through break-ups, through interrogations from well-meaning parents and friends about why we are still single, through bad first dates, and through no dates.

I’ve always thought that if you were single, you were supposed to be constantly busy in ministry, and I’ve felt guilty for not doing more. Lately, I’ve realized that being single can be ministry:

  • It’s fasting and praying through Monday lunch for marriages and changed hearts.
  • It’s comforting a friend who’s gone through a break-up because I can relate.
  • It’s sitting next to that new girl who comes to church by herself  because I know how intimidating it can be to walk into church alone.
  • It’s getting a chance to share my faith with a coworker who opened up to me about his loneliness and asked how I’ve dealt with mine.

Someone once told me, “You do singleness so well.” I still don’t know what that means or if I should be offended by it, but I realize that through allowing me to experience being single and all that goes with it, God has been building a more caring, compassionate me who can testify of the work He has done in my heart. That’s how I define doing singleness well.

This week as you fast and pray, realize that you are part of a ministry – the ministry of intercession and caring for others – and pray that you will do singleness well.

In Him,


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13 Responses to Doing Singleness Well

  1. Dorcas Aondona says:

    Oh this is encouraging!

  2. butterfly says:

    This post gave me hope and took some of the loneliness away. I am getting over a hurtful situation where I was rejected and hurt purposely in a relationship. This hurt has lead me to feel hopeless. I came across your post searching for ways to fast and pray and I must say God lead me here. Thank you for showing me I am not alone.

  3. Desiray says:

    amen! I love your site because it is about prayer and fasting for marriages and we surely do need to be doing it more often, lifting up marriages not just our own but across the world…God bless you

  4. Dedi says:


    i don’t know what led me to your post, but thank you. i was simmply looking for a simple prayer to say before i break my fast.

    thank you. thank you

  5. Neelam says:

    Thanks Emily. That’s a beautiful post. Really needed it today!

  6. Beth says:

    Thank you for the sobering reminder of our ministry of intercession and compassion. It was a tough weekend for me. Reminded that my biological clock is ticking away and saw that a new couple got together. I hate the feeling of insecurity and doubts, but you’ve reminded me to turn my eyes away from myself. Thank you once again!

    • Emily says:

      Beth, I am so sorry to hear about your hurt. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability with us – will be praying for you today!

  7. amy says:

    such lovely, encouraging words – thanks emily!

  8. Susan says:

    Emily. . .
    As always, because of God’s grace, I have been blessed by this post. When I wallow I need to look up toward God recognizing it is all for HIS GLORY. . .
    in MY singleness story!!

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