The Heart of the Matter

On Mondays we fast and pray for godly marriages for those who desire them, and for men and women to become clearer, deeper and stronger bearers of God’s image in their own unique ways. 

This idea of fasting and praying for marriage, men and women was conceived in the summer of 2007 at a girlfriends’ beach weekend.  One of us had just broken up with a man she would later marry.  Another had been dumped by someone she wouldn’t see again.  The third of us was taking time off from a guy with whom she would eventually break up.  Sitting there, watching sunsets over delicious dinners, the three of us realized that our best, savviest, and most self-reflectively strategic attempts couldn’t get us that for which our hearts longed:  marriage.

Fast and Pray was born.

In the nine years since that weekend, fast.pray has had tens of writers and perhaps two thousand participants.  And many of the women joining in the prayer movement have had amazing testimonies about changed character, emergent relationships and new marriages.  My testimony is simply this:  we Chardonnay sipping single ladies were mostly right.  Our best, savviest, most self-reflective, emotionally intelligent, and strategic attempts can never get us that for which our hearts long.  But what has changed in nine years is my understanding of the nature of the “that,” the object of our longings. 

Sitting at that beach house, we all were longing for marriage (two of us our now married, with kids).  That yearning was and is legit.  The urge to merge is wrapped up with God’s Trinitarian and relational nature, no doubt!  It’s linked to a longing for the image of God to show up as wholly as possible with men and women in union together.  It’s connected to the crucial context for bearing children.  It’s woven into an array of things like physical desire, community building, character development, church life, social place and, simply, love.  Marriage is God’s good idea.

The last nine years, however, have taught me about my deepest of deeps.  Dig down honestly and long enough and, actually, I’m longing for something more than marriage.  Don’t get me wrong, if I stay single until I die, there will be certain Saturday nights where I sigh and say, “Oh how I wish I were snuggling with someone on the sofa” or Christmas mornings where I declare, “How I wish mine were a house full of children.”  There’s no shame in that.  But nine years has broken me open to my deepest desire:  the marriage feast of the Lamb.  I yearn for Jesus Christ to come back and make all things fully, completely, and relentlessly right.  I long for the new heavens and the new earth with our worship-worthy Jesus smack dab in the middle of it all, reigning, mysteriously powerful and intimately loving, among his people from every neighborhood and community, every culture and ethnic persuasion.

Nine years ago I would have thought that such a longing was hyper-spiritualized at best, a depressing copout at worst.  But the years have shown me that my soul longs to be satisfied in the morning—and spurred forward throughout each day—with the kind of love that never, ever fails.  That, I have learned, is divine and eternal Love.  So in nine years, inconceivably to me, my prayer has changed.  “Come Lord Jesus!” I now cry out from the center of my being.  And then, with a little wink and twinkle in my eye, I tack on (because our God is good and gets our hearts), “And if you want to send me a good guy in the meantime, well, I’d like that, too.” J

Thanks for being in this journey together.  It has been my joy.  Fast.Pray might be ending, but our real journey continues—towards Him who has no end!


PS: Since announcing that the blog was coming to an end, we’ve had some questions from a reader (also, our friend) who was interested in continuing the blog on an ad-hoc basis. We’re taking our usual August sabbatical, but don’t be surprised if you see some emails popping up again in the fall from our dear friend Leigh. We couldn’t be more happy for this news! And we’re grateful that this is perhaps more the end of a chapter than the end of the blog itself. The next chapter may have a slightly different format, but we’re excited for the voice and vision of this online community to continue in any format. Many blessings on your summer break. With love, Michelle, Amy and Connally 


Posted in Author: Connally | 14 Comments

My Parting Words

On Mondays we fast and pray for godly marriages for those who desire them, and for men and women to become clearer, deeper and stronger bearers of God’s image in their own unique ways. 

What can I possibly add to the 9 years of blog archives that hasn’t already been said? Probably not much, because I’ve been preceded by some pretty amazing women with wise words. So as I contemplated how to wrap up my season of writing regularly about singleness, I figured the best way is to part with some stories.

Doing Laundry

Retired man: Are you married?

Me: No

RM: Can you hurry up and get married so you can buy my washer and dryer?

Me: But I already own a washer and dryer!

Why do people assume single people don’t participate in normal life activities like owning houses and appliances? It seems there will always be people that don’t understand singleness and make comments out of ignorance, and not to be intentionally hurtful. Our job is to educate and give grace to those that have never walked our road.

My challenge is to not allow these possibly hurtful comments to stick in my heart like arrows, arrows with the poison of bitterness or the potential to cause atrophy. Whether single beyond the “normal” age, married without children, or another path that challenges convention, people will often not understand and speak words that shoot like arrows. I have a choice to become hard-hearted and not allow anything to penetrate my heart or turn away the arrow with kind words and grace for the archer.

Provers 15:21  A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Ephesians 6:16  In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.

Going It Alone

I’ve often had people say “So you did such-and-such alone?” My response is typically, “Well, if I wanted to do such-and-such, it was either alone or not at all, because I couldn’t find someone to join me!” It could be as simple as going to the movies or a restaurant, or as involved as a road trip or living by myself. I don’t necessarily like doing stuff alone, but I’d often rather “do” than not. This is probably the area of singleness that is the most challenging for me, not having a built-in partner for adventure. I realize that even in marriage, I’m not guaranteed to have a spouse that will join me for my every whim, but it’s at least possible I’d get some participation. God has blessed me with some great friends through the years that have joined me on adventures, and I’m so grateful. A recent idea for a great adventure showed me God’s faithfulness in both having people join and in going it alone.

I’m currently between employment gigs and wanted this time to be filled with more than just combing the internet, so I set out to do what I’m really good at… planning an adventure! My family was worried about my safety if I ventured alone, so I prayed that if this crazy idea was to come to fruition I would find some fellow sojourners to join me. Well, it worked out that I had 6 people join me for various lengths of my bike ride from DC to Pittsburgh on the C&O and GAP trails. I was only by myself for 1.5 days and two nights of the trek. God answered my prayer for company!

God also came through during the time I was alone! Last Monday morning I set out from camp alone on the trail, biking 64 miles to the next campsite. It was going well, until a severe thunderstorm rolled through causing more challenge than one little girl with small-ish muscles was prepared to handle. As I biked on, after hunkering down behind a tree during the storm with a nice couple from Atlanta, I came across many downed trees as a result of the storm. Getting my bike, loaded with gear and food, over these trees was more than I bargained for on this adventure. I didn’t count, but it felt like 15 – 20 trees with one section of about a ¼ mile filled with tree after tree. Some of the trees were 3 feet off the ground! I ended up taking my panniers off of the bike and carrying the gear ahead and coming back for the bike, leap-frogging my way passed the downed trees. Someone forgot to bring bug spray, so the mosquitoes were excited by the fresh meat available during this leap-frogging activity. I had no option but to move forward and get to camp, turning around would have required too many miles to get to a campsite, so I pushed on.
When the trail finally broke free of the downed trees, I hopped on my bike and pedaled the last 5 miles to camp. I was fighting hunger and chasing daylight! Tears began to well-up in my eyes, because that was seriously tough! Thoughts of facing challenges like this alone made me cry more. Then I thought of all of the people that face challenges every day that are physically and emotionally exhausting, I just had a hard afternoon, they may have to walk miles for water or toil in back-breaking work that will never get them enough money to be free from their indentured labor. I cried some more.

I was so thankful that I wasn’t stopped on the trail where the storm wreaked havoc. I was thankful that God saved me and gave me the strength to push through the trees and get to camp. Another thunderstorm rolled through at 3am, but I was safe and dry. That day was tough and pushed me to the end of myself, but into the arms of God.

The next morning as I ate my oatmeal, I shuffled the music on my phone and the first song up was Never Once by Matt Redman, followed by Sovereign by Chris Tomlin and My Lighthouse by Rend Collective. God met me in the middle of the woods and encouraged my heart. I had another day mostly alone and a 51 mile bike ride ahead, including a 25 mile hill climb, but I knew that God was with me, no matter what I faced.

Life is going to throw us challenges. We may be alone or surrounded by a crowd. Ultimately, what matters is where we look for our source of strength? If I had been biking with another person when I hit the downed trees, it would have been tough but we could have worked together to lift and shove. Although, I probably wouldn’t have cried as much, prayed as much, or looked to God for strength if someone else was present. I’m learning to use these alone times to build a greater dependency on God. A spouse can’t and won’t be able to meet all of my needs or be the support I need all of the time, so I’m continuing to be challenged to fully rely on God.

Isaiah 40:28-29 Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength.

Embrace Life to the Fullest

If there is one thing I’d love to communicate to all women, it’s to live life to the fullest! No matter the letters before your name, God has an incredible journey for you. Take risk, love hard, pray harder, walk on water, follow Jesus where He leads, and laugh every day. You may feel cheated out of your heart’s desires, but I promise God sees you. God has not forsaken us! Don’t allow what you don’t have to cloud what you do have… Life in Jesus! Some of my favorite verses are

2 Corinthians 2:14-16 – The Message (MSG)

In the Messiah, in Christ, God leads us from place to place in one perpetual victory parade. Through us, he brings knowledge of Christ. Everywhere we go, people breathe in the exquisite fragrance. Because of Christ, we give off a sweet scent rising to God, which is recognized by those on the way of salvation—an aroma redolent with life. But those on the way to destruction treat us more like the stench from a rotting corpse.

Do you smell of LIFE in Christ?

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:20-21, NIV)


Thank you for reading and praying with us!





Posted in Author: Michelle | 10 Comments

Fare Thee Well

On Mondays we fast and pray for godly marriages for those who desire them, and for men and women to become clearer, deeper and stronger bearers of God’s image in their own unique ways. 

Side Note: I’ve done a lot of things instead of writing this post. I’ve cleaned my kitchen. Posted things on social media. Checked to see if my favorite stores were having sales. Read articles about unaccompanied minors in the LA public school system. Watched Simone Biles highlight reels. Truly I have done almost everything except sit down to write. But here we are…a farewell post of sorts. Written by someone who does not do well with change! Here are my somewhat disheveled thoughts about this fastpray adventure, garnished with so much gratitude:

  • Prayer Together. Prayer is always a good idea, but I began to find the power of consistent prayer with friends due to this fastpray adventure. Anna (former fp writer) and I spent several years praying together on Mondays and it was an incredible blessing. First, it was a level of friendship intimacy that I didn’t have in other areas of life – both for accountability and partnership in prayer. Secondly, it allowed us to celebrate together when the Lord graciously answered so many prayers – for marriages, yes, and also for so many bits of life. It rooted our friendship into shared journey with Jesus – a redemptive, encouraging and healthy center for any human relationship.
  • Heart Change. One of my chief issues with singleness is that it can seem like one unrelenting blob in terms of time. No big markers like family wedding celebrations or babies. Fewer external third-party lines in the sand when it’s time to quit my job or move to a new city or buy a house. Less clarity about when and how we shift from children to adults without community markers of that transition. It can all blur together.

    And yet I can definitely say that I am in a very different place now than when I went to the beach in 2011 for an impromptu singleness retreat. As with Michelle’s post last week about seasons – things on a heart level have changed, even if I am as unmarried as I was then. Lots of God’s word, counseling, and lots of truth-with-grace friendships with brothers and sisters in Christ over the years have begun to show me my true identity in Christ. Instead of letting the (valid) pain of my singleness identity define me, I am starting to be the real me that Christ defines. That’s a good thing to remember when things blur together again in the future. Just because the circumstances aren’t changing doesn’t mean change isn’t happening!

  • Hope. The generosity of encouraging emails, comments and kind words from complete strangers (you!) proved to be an unforeseen but needed part of writing. I was encouraged that my journey was not in isolation, and I was and am so grateful for each of you. More importantly, I think writing some of this journey in public has forced me to pay closer attention to the desires of my heart and the reality of the helplessness and grief that singleness (or life in general) brings to the surface. Although that was / is painful, I think it was one of the doorways God has used to show me where to find true hope. Hope has grown because of this adventure, and I am grateful.

Lastly, I started writing because of singleness itself. (Well, that and because Connally Gilliam is a very encouraging human being, but I digress!) My writing over the past few years has flowed from my ups and downs of confronting the complexities of the unsought singleness realm and somehow meeting Jesus in the mix. Even as I went from crazy-dating-all-the-time to taking a break from dating to counseling to intensive work around relational brokenness, writing in this venue was a constant.

Several months ago, I was set up on a blind date by a friend. I thought this would be yet another chapter in the horror film/comedy known as my dating life. And it has been – but because we’re actually still dating! I know; I’m as surprised as anyone. He is a mashup of things I did not think existed in one person: loves Jesus, much taller than me, smart, interesting, passionate, kind, and up for anything. Yet, like singleness, this has not been some sort of magical journey with unicorns and fairy dust. And yet, also much like singleness, it has been a reminder that I do not have (in myself) what it takes…I need to daily depend on God’s grace and spiritual strength in this arena too.

It has been a good road and we are hopeful about where it is headed. Even if circumstances happen to take unforeseen detours, I know more deeply about God’s faithfulness now than before. I also know that this thing called marriage is not strong enough to hold up the weight of my heart’s desires – I knew it before, but I know it again in a concrete way even in the goodness of dating this man. Our hearts are made for heaven, and I think singleness and marriage are two of the ways our loving Father sanctifies us on that journey home.

In closing, I am praying that the Lord multiplies our prayers and answers us above what we could ask or imagine. I will keep praying on Mondays, and many of your names are on the list on my desk. I am praying that He opens doors for each of us to pray and share with others, to be patient when it looks like nothing is changing, for cleansing tears when the grief is tangible, and for solid gritty hope and true friends when we get distracted, discouraged or defensive.

I am grateful to have walked this part of the journey with each of you, and I look forward to heaven because there are lots of you I have never met, and whose stories of redemption we all look forward to hearing!

In His Grace,


Posted in Author: Amy | 12 Comments


We fast and pray asking for the Lord to bring healing in our times: for men to be bold and to walk in to relationships with women, for women to be soft and willing to be molded by God’s gracious plan in their lives, and for God to give the good gift of marriage to those who desire it.

When I moved to Florida I thought I would love the year-round summer and never miss the other seasons. While I loved looking outside and seeing palm trees, I did find myself missing the seasons. Like the beginning of spring when you can roll down your car windows for the first time and the flowers and trees start to bud. I also missed leaves changing color in fall and snow days in winter. Florida only has winter indoors with the air conditioning turned to subzero temperatures. I used to joke that Florida seasons were just degrees of heat (hot, HOT, and hotter).

I eventually left the heat of Florida and returned to the land of seasons. Some may think I’m crazy for moving away from the Sunshine State, but for me the seasons were beckoning (among other things). There is just something about the change of seasons… a range of temperatures, new wardrobe options, different outdoor activities, scenery variations, and the list could go on. I like seasons!

It’s popular these days to talk about life in terms of seasons. Perhaps the writer of Ecclesiastes started it and then The Byrds put it to music with:

To everything (turn, turn, turn)

​There is a season (turn, turn, turn)

​And a time to every purpose, under Heaven

A season for this and a season for that, turn, turn, turn! Here is my deal, I have an issue with using the idea of seasons when discussing certain aspects of life. It’s not that I think the writer of Ecclesiastes was off his rocker and missed hearing from God on the seasons thing, because there is a “time to every purpose, under Heaven.” I struggle with referencing singleness and marriage in terms of seasons. Like you are in your single season of life and when you get married that’s the married season. Using the word season, implies a change is coming, that the status is temporary, and has a start and stop point. Singleness has a starting point for everyone, birth, but may not have an ending point for everyone. Marriage has a starting point, but should not be thought to have an ending point, ya know the whole “until death us do part” thing. So to refer to singleness and marriage as seasons is not really correct.

I think the seasons changing in Ecclesiastes is a direct reference to the word “purpose.” I may be single for my entire life, but my purpose in life will go through changing seasons as my vocation, geographic location, relationships, involvement in church, and other aspects of life evolve and flux through the ages. I spent a season of my twenties involved in youth ministry, my purpose during that time was directly related to my vocation. I’ve had seasons of clarity and seasons that were cloudy, seasons of feeling super connected to God and seasons when I struggled to hear Him, and times when my purpose was clear.

There is a season that is changing. The FastPray blog has served a season of nearly 9 years, but it is time for a change. Fasting and praying is definitely not for a season, and we hope everyone out there continues to seek God through fasting and prayer. It’s through our prayer times and in consultation with former FastPray writers that Amy and I, as the remaining writers, have felt led to end the FastPray blog. We love the community this blog has gathered, and have been encouraged by you. I know for me, it’s time to take a break from thinking and writing about singleness for a while. Writing about singleness and sharing my thoughts with this community has been a pleasure and a privilege, but it means that I’m always thinking about singleness and what I’m going to share with the FastPray community. I need some time to not have to think about singleness as my primary identifier.

We will continue writing and sending out posts through the end of July. While we understand this may come as a shock to some, we hope that you understand this decision was not taken lightly. As we share our parting words over the next several weeks, know that you will continue to be in our prayers long after we stop appearing in your inbox.

A time for every purpose, under Heaven!


Posted in Author: Michelle | 34 Comments

Hell Will Not Overcome

We fast and pray asking for the Lord to bring healing in our times: for men to be bold and to walk in to relationships with women, for women to be soft and willing to be molded by God’s gracious plan in their lives, and for God to give the good gift of marriage to those who desire it.

The turmoil around the globe in the past week is hard to ignore. Innocent lives lost in Baghdad cafes and the Istanbul airport, human rights advocates murdered in Kenya, and that’s only scratching the surface. Life closer to home isn’t much better – recently, a new affirmation by the highest court that the continuing murder of unborn children must remain untouched. 

In the midst of painful headlines, it is easy to get overwhelmed and zone out. There is too much pain, too many disturbing images, and a deep sense of helplessness in the face of so much suffering. Aren’t Christians supposed to have a safe bubble – a world without turmoil? Shouldn’t God’s favor protect us from the pain of this life? Scripture is clear about what we’re called to and what Jesus promised: 

John 16:33: I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world

In contrast to the recent headlines, Anna’s wedding, this weekend, was a lovely and fun and oh-so-happy celebration. It was truly a day to share in the joy of God bringing the two of them together and hopeful in anticipation of what God will do with their lives together. We sang a worship song during the ceremony with the following verse: 

No guilt in life, no fear in death,

This is the power of Christ in me;

From life’s first cry to final breath.

Jesus commands my destiny.

No power of hell, no scheme of man,

Can ever pluck me from His hand;

Till He returns or calls me home,

Here in the power of Christ I’ll stand.

I hadn’t thought about it, but the reality is that the wedding itself was also a testament to the power of Christ in that the bride and groom recognized their dependence on God’s sovereign plan to bring them together in His timing. And on a larger scale, as a Christian marriage they were reminded that their first and greatest calling is to stand in the power of Christ until He returns or calls them home. The new marriage also represents the potential for new life – in terms of the couple’s potential children and/or by spiritual parenting of the people God places in their life. The wedding is a symbol pointing to a greater reality, and the couple recognizes their small place in that bigger story. 

In some sense, the wedding was a public reminder that we, as the body of Christ, stand for a true reality that is opposite what we read in the headlines. Married or not, we share this confidence – no power of hell, no scheme of man, can ever pluck me from His hand – and that is in stark contrast to our surrounding world.  

It will of course take courage to follow Christ – whether He calls us to the vocation of marriage or the vocation of singleness. He has told us that there will be suffering regardless, and He has told us that He has already conquered the world. What a clear reason to celebrate, at weddings and in the midst of turmoil. That the events of our world are not too much for our sovereign Lord. Our marital status, our level of comfort, and our geographic location are not too much for Jesus. 

We can engage the world we live in without fear. We can celebrate deeply at weddings and pray for spouses for those of us who still desire to get married. We can mourn the violence and coldness seen around our world and nation and find joy in freedom. We can find peace in a world of contrasts when we keep our eyes fixed on Jesus. Because Christ lived an incarnate life, died and was raised, so we can never be plucked from His hand. And that should be celebrated every day! 

In His Grace, 


Posted in Author: Amy | 1 Comment

What Would I Tell My Younger Me

We fast and pray asking for the Lord to bring healing in our times: for men to be bold and to walk in to relationships with women, for women to be soft and willing to be molded by God’s gracious plan in their lives, and for God to give the good gift of marriage to those who desire it.

I was recently asked to share my testimony, including some of the bits about my singleness journey, with a ministry group. As I was jotting down some thoughts, it seemed to me that the best way to share it was in the sense of advice to myself – just a decade ago. I’d graduated from college and was preparing for a year abroad, unsure of what my life would look like beyond that year. But I was 99% certain it would include marriage, and obviously in my 20s. I gave very little thought to this since I assumed it would happen in due course. That wasn’t what happened. Instead, a lot of other things happened…but here are some highlights of what I’d tell Younger Me!

Both the church and the culture will give you false narratives about singleness.

You grew up being taught that secular culture’s approaches to sexuality were deeply flawed, and Future Me still broadly agrees with that premise. What no one told you (yet) was that the church was (is?) highly influenced by the culture and was often feeding you dressed-up Christianized lies about sexuality. Culture said sex was the best thing ever. Christians said married sex was the best thing ever. (#smh) Bottom line – what does it say if your behavior is incrementally different from the culture but you’re still fundamentally worshipping the same idols? God’s grace calls us to radical obedience that destroys the old idols, including in how we honor Him with our sexuality. You’ll learn the rest later!

Secondly, the culture says that singleness is amazing time of finding yourself, dating as many people as possible, and generally having an awesome time. The church said singleness is a “season” that is designed to prepare you for your life goal of marriage. They’re both mostly wrong. Singleness is a unique call of often unforeseeable-length in a Christian’s life – one that includes learning to love and mature in adulthood, spiritual parenthood, and beyond. As a believer, it has particular gifts and particular sorrows. Secular friends won’t understand that you actually might want to get married, and Christian friends won’t understand that you might actually be content in your current state. Contentment and desire are not mutually exclusive. In fact, singleness can be a crystal clear picture of how they co-exist and reinforce one another in a believer’s life.

There is a third way. Unfortunately, there aren’t really any maps. Most of your friends, younger siblings (sorry – you’ll be single at all of their weddings!!), and family haven’t walked the road you’ll be walking. It’s you and Jesus, and His body the church. Embrace it. It’s the only way to walk. All I can say is grab some dear friends, start praying, and wait for Jesus to show up! 

Intimacy is scary. It’s a risk worth taking.

I know. Intimacy seems like a big word. One that you “save” for marriage or something. Well, it’s not because it’s much broader than sexual intimacy. The human heart is wired for relational intimacy from day one – wanting to be known and loved, and wanting to know and to love the other. This is how God designed us, and you can’t “wait for marriage” to get started on this. You need to take appropriate risks in being known with friends, with coworkers, with spiritual mentors. You aren’t wired to do life alone, and God is placing all sorts of people in your life to practice loving and being loved.

The thing is that sometimes you’re going to share your heart and the friendship or relationship is going to transition, and sometimes it’s going to vanish entirely. It’s going to hurt, and sometimes it’s going to hurt for a long time. That doesn’t mean the risk of intimacy wasn’t worth it. 

It might seem easier to hide. To craft a little space and internal world where no one else can intrude, and you can control most of the variables. It doesn’t work and it often ends in some sort of addiction. (Trust me on this one.) Our hearts are seeking love – we can try to crush them, but they’re very hard to extinguish. Instead let your heart’s desire point you to Life itself, Jesus Christ. He’s the one who can bring our hearts to spiritual life and vibrancy. And life is much better when your heart is vibrantly alive. Hint: you don’t need marriage to be vibrantly alive. Also here’s another hint: a lot of married people want vibrantly alive hearts too, and marriage didn’t deliver the goods. Befriend them and their spouse and their children. You’ll all be better off.

God does see you, and He can actually meet your needs.

If you remember nothing else, remember this. God does see you. He hasn’t forgotten. He hasn’t turned away. He hasn’t left you alone. He knows, better than any human, what it means to be single. What it means to be alone, feel marginalized, and not included in the community. He knows the depth of temptation. We don’t have a high priest who doesn’t get it – Jesus gets it. He knows how loud the voice of shame can sound in our ears. He knows the brave price of obedience in the secret places of the heart that no other human might ever see. 

His word is full of promises that are absolutely trustworthy. I’m serious. Lean on them and find out that they can hold you in the grief, the disappointment, the hope, the glimpses of eternity. This road is paved with the legacies of so many other saints who also never knew the temporal joys of marriage – read their stories too. Open your heart to the love of Christ, and then open your eyes to those around you who need His love. You are not anything less than a beloved child of God, a vessel for His love, and one who has had good works prepared in advance for you to do. Bravely embrace the tiny corner of creation you are given today. Tomorrow is a question mark – but Jesus says it already has enough worries to keep itself occupied. 

There’s a lot more I could write, but the honest truth is that the story is still going. I don’t know how it ends (I know, I know…you thought Future Me would have all the answers. Again, sorry.) but I do know that the presence and love of Jesus Christ is the only thing that can carry us to the other end of the map.

By His Grace,



PS: In other news, our former writer Anna is getting married to James, a lovely and godly Christian man. We couldn’t be happier and many of the fp writers (past and present) will be celebrating with them on Saturday! We know this is God’s good grace in the form of answered prayer – and we are grateful together!

Posted in Author: Amy | 6 Comments

Thy Will Be Done

We fast and pray asking for the Lord to bring healing in our times: for men to be bold and to walk in to relationships with women, for women to be soft and willing to be molded by God’s gracious plan in their lives, and for God to give the good gift of marriage to those who desire it.

Listening to Spotify the other week, a song caught my ear and I immediately identified with the words. Since that day, I’ve shared it, purchased it, and repeatedly played it. The lead female vocalist, Hillary Scott, from the popular country music band, Lady Antebellum, is set to release an album with her family in the coming months. In April, the first song from the album was released, entitled Thy Will. Read through the lyrics below…

Thy Will by Hillary Scott

I’m so confused
I know I heard you loud and clear
So, I followed through
Somehow I ended up here
I don’t wanna think
I may never understand
That my broken heart is a part of your plan
When I try to pray
All I’ve got is hurt and these four words

Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done

I know you’re good
But this don’t feel good right now
And I know you think
Of things I could never think about
It’s hard to count it all joy
Distracted by the noise
Just trying to make sense
Of all your promises
Sometimes I gotta stop
Remember that you’re God
And I am not

Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Like a child on my knees all that comes to me is
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will

I know you see me
I know you hear me, Lord
Your plans are for me
Goodness you have in store
I know you hear me
I know you see me, Lord
Your plans are for me
Good news you have in store

So, thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Like a child on my knees all that comes to me is
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
I know you see me
I know you hear me, Lord

I don’t know where you find yourself today. Perhaps, like Hillary Scott, you find yourself in the middle of heartbreak and are struggling to understand why because you thought you were following God, so how did you end up here? The billboard for Christianity should read “Following God is never safe or without pain.” That’s often hard to reconcile with the loving God we know wants the best for us, can pain really be part of His plan? Does my heart have to break? I didn’t sign up for this, I thought this was going to work out for the good (Romans 8:28).

Perspective. I don’t often have the perspective I need to see how the broken heart and pain fit into the plan. I may never understand, time may never provide the distance to know why, so I have to trust God’s perspective.

Hillary Scott chose not to reveal why she wrote these words, because she wanted them to speak to each person without her story interfering. It doesn’t matter why these words spoke to me either. What matters is each person being able to say “though I don’t understand, though my heart breaks, though I’m sick, though… THY WILL BE DONE!”

Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

Psalm 23:4

Thy Will Be Done!




Posted in Author: Michelle | 7 Comments