This is your reminder that was are fasting and praying during what would be Monday lunch for marriages for those who long to be married and for the courage & strength for men and women to walk upright and into marriage. And as you fast & pray with the 740 of us (!), here are a few words to consider from one of our fast-pray-ers, Emily.
I nearly had a panic attack driving home from work at the end of this past week. Let me explain…
No one—let alone a single girl—should have to throw two bridal showers in one week and volunteer to cook and deliver a meal to a family that just had a baby in between shower planning. But this has been my life of late: bridal showers, bachelorette parties, weddings, baby showers, helping friends move into their newly-purchased homes.
The tears were about to surface as I ran through my mental check list of things to do—cook a meal that’s nursing-mom-and-baby friendly, finish my microeconomics homework by 11p.m. for the summer class I am taking for personal edification (don’t ask me why—I couldn’t tell you at this point), finish my shopping list for bridal shower #2, go grocery shopping for the 4th time this week to buy food for bridal shower #2, finish unpacking from spending the weekend away at bridal shower #1… Why is traffic so bad when I am in a hurry?!?
“Lord, why me? Why does it always seem that I end up in this place, running around doing things so I can make other people happy—people who should be happy enough with their impending weddings and new babies without me having to shower them with gifts! I don’t know how I am going to get everything done. I am tired. I am going broke. I don’t want to spend the evening tripping over my roommates in our tiny kitchen. I am done. I am tired of giving.”
His answer was to remind me of a conversation I had with my roommates two nights before when they told me neither of them would be home until late that night. This meant I could take over the kitchen without fear of getting in anyone’s way, blast the worship music, and sing my way through my chores. And I did just that. I got the to-do list done plus two loads of laundry and finally hung the new shower curtain I bought three weeks ago. It was a late night, but once I was finished, the rest He gave me was so sweet.
It’s amazing how that still, small voice can bring calm, and that something as little as having the apartment to myself for the evening can remind me that He’s looking out for me.
This is why I fast and pray. To remind me that I am not alone in this journey. To remind me that God will bless my obedience to His Word. To carve the time out of my busy schedule to reflect upon the ways He has blessed me by making sure my needs are always met. To allow Him to fill me with His supernatural joy that gets me through each and every day and keeps the bitterness I often feel welling up inside of me from consuming me. To remind me that my hope is in Him—not just my hope that I will someday be married and have a family, but my hope of a permanent home in Heaven, my “continuing city” (Hebrews 13:14) where I won’t feel out of place because I’m a single, where all these tears will be wiped away.
For this, I am eternally grateful.